We the Sheeple

We, the Sheeple of the Mcnited States of Wal-merica, promise to sit on our fat asses, glued to the telev ision, for at least six hours, every day, without fail, so that we may receive our daily instructions from the media on what we should fear, how afraid we should be (they have a handy color chart), what products we should buy to stay safe, and not buy, lest they endanger our precious little spoiled fucking monsters in some trivial way. God forbid they ever fall down, get a boo boo, be disappointed in any way, or ever fail at anything, even if they are fucking stupid. We promise to never question anything the media or the government tells us, as that would be unpatriotic and anti-American of us. We solemnly swear to coddle our children until their brains turn to toothpaste. We must reward them with candy, sodas and graduation ceremonies from every grade, just in case they do not feel special, so that they do not grow up to become serial killers, or, God forbid, free thinkers. We also promise that in return for our complete and total lack of motivation, we expect nothing from our government, other than the same partisan bullshit they have fed us for the last 40 years. We promise to keep breeding and feeding these little brats until they are old enough to send to war to defend America's right to rob other countries of their natural resources, and rape and murder their people at will. After all, God is on our side, right?

If this pissed you off, GOOD! DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! GET YOUR NEWS FROM INDEPENDENT MEDIA SOURCES WHO ARE NOT RATINGS DEPENDENT. VOTE OUT INCUMBENTS - ALL OF THEM!! IF WE DON'T CHANGE IT, NOBODY WILL!!

Groverat